Recently, I've been considering a lot for stuff about my views of the world. Stuff like: why/how do we exist? Is there a god? How do we know that science is true? Yadda yadda yadda, blah blah blah. And so on, and so forth until my brain hurts. But it's weird, thinking stuff like this. It fills you up with this strange sensation of nausea and excitement; the wonder at whether what you're pondering is either fascinatingly genius, or dangerously psychotic. In the end, it leaves you with both a worrying paranoia about the "point" of it all, and a satisfying shot of intelligence. The problem comes with distinguishing one from the other, much like the ol' "red wire or blue wire" debate in that arduous task of defusing a bomb (I'm sure you've all been there).
What I'm struggling with though, is trying to define what exactly it is I think. But then it is hard to pin down the exact thoughts I have. I don't reject God, yet I don't accept him. Surely that makes me Agnostic, right? But then I think of how I'm mostly on the side of rejection than faith, and how it's not God per se, but maybe just some "Higher Being(s)". However, upon deeper thought, I don't think we'll ever know what makes the pure idea of living, as humans, which points toward something called Absurdism: to believe that it is humanly impossible for us to ever understand the meaning of life, as such. Perhaps life is humans, is what my mind now leans to, promoting a Humanist philosophy within me. Are we responsible for giving our own lives meaning? Because that question leads down a very long, very confusing road known as Existentialism.
And from there, well then anything is possible, as long as you give it the thought. I could be the only real person, with everyone else just created to service the path I've been given within this sole, central universe. We could all be figments of each other's imaginations, we could all be living inside a tiny hologram of the universe, we could all be dead, passing onto the next stage. One radical idea a friend suggested to me, was that we are all one person, who - despite the billions of paradoxes it would create - is just going back in time after each life to live within another person, with no memory of the life before. It sounds absolutely ridiculous, completely insane, and utterly bat-crap crazy, I understand that. But how do you know? Surely everything we currently believe is just based on a single idea, no matter how ludicrous, and has slowly expanded over time to the point of almost pure international truth.
Take our current views on chemistry and physics. We're not certain of these, they aren't the absolute truth of why the universe is like that. They are, instead, just the human truth of it, until something else comes along to change that. Take religion, any kind you like. Now think about 1000 years ago, where literally everyone believed in a deity of some kind, and imagine trying to explain science. You'd be laughed at, for sure. And in 1000 years from now, when science has advanced or something entirely new has come along, they may laugh at every single fact we think we have procured today. What I'm saying is that, despite whatever, there is no truth: everything is just Human understanding and the evolution of that.
Numbers are another great example. The way people believe that the 21/12/12 will be the end of the world, just because the Mayans wrote it down. But the Universe does not submit to numbers, because ultimately that's all they are. But it is not the opposite either, because it is only Humans that numbers submit to; no more, no less. There could be alien races that have entirely different number systems, countless variations of counting, infinite possibilities of infinity. The world still works and moves forward (as we currently believe), no matter if we have clocks or not.
|The exit is to your mind...|
In the end, you just need to ask yourself what your truth is, what you want to keep as personal truth, just so we don't all kill ourselves from curiosity and the prospect that death equals answers. It's confusing and vast and mad and, often, too much, but the real truth is your own, regardless. After all, belief is just what we give as an answer to life, to tide us over for our time in this universe. It keeps us sane, it keeps us right and above all it keeps us Human. No one can take away truth, meaning or reality from anyone else, because it is true to them, so what's the point wasting life away attempting to disprove something that's only created to get through life. Everything is true, nothing can totally, honestly, really be disproved, as long as it lives inside someone's belief.
So, technically, my Philosophy is what I want. I don't need to put a label on it like it's some kind of cheesy, High School drama. Facebook may ask for just one "Philosophy or Belief" on my profile, but I know there is so much more to that. So I guess, when the Sun finally sets on our short times upon this world, we will go out with the truth that is our own personalised truth. Be it what it is, at least it was your Human truth.
And that my friends, is my Philosophy.